Category Archives: Healthy Living

10Apr 2013

Importance of self-care

I can’t believe it’s been several months since I blogged! I do apologize….well…sort of!
Let me explain.

I’ve been doing 2 things-

1. Practicing self-care
2. Trying new things!

So rather than apologize all over myself to you, let’s use my “explanation” as a learning tool/growth opportunity today :)

Self-care:

It is so important to make sure you set your own limits for yourself and take care of yourself. Nobody can do it for you!

My time has been even more limited lately. I have been very busy at work (which I enjoy) and running the business side of things can take a lot of time outside of my time with clients. Because of this increase, something had to go! Many days it was a choice to either take a break and eat my lunch or do my blog. Because of the busyness at IH right now, I felt I would be better to myself (and ultimately to my clients) if I chose lunch. Self-care!
It was hard at first. I do a blog weekly, people look forward to it (according to their comments to me), and well, it’s something I love!

It is easy to feel like because you have always done something, you have to keep doing it, even when saying no for a moment might be better. Even if it is a good
thing! But remember, you have to take care of yourself or you will burn out and eventually not enjoy that thing you love anyway.

Trying something new:

Before the business side of things got so “busy”, I had already committed to blogging for some outside sources. I wanted to keep those commitments because I made them and because I think it’s good to branch out and try new things. It has been a great experience. I have enjoyed blogging for Northview Church, Relationshipcafe.com, and MarriageAdvice.com. They truly have been good opportunities. It was nice to try something new. However, I have decided to let go of the amount I was blogging for them, in order to do more self-care (and hopefully start blogging more here again.)

So the moral of the story is it’s good to try new things but also take care of yourself! That way you can be the best at what you do and not burn out.

I hope to start blogging here more regularly again. If I don’t, know that I am either practicing self-care or trying something new!

Thank you so much for reading this week.

What can do today to practice self-care? Or try something new?

Written by Natalie Chandler

Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC, LCAC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling.  We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville

28Nov 2012

Is this Really a Problem?

I was so frustrated! Are you kidding me? Traffic was lined up as far as I could see and I had a client in just a few short minutes. I’m not one to like to be late for appointments, particularly when running my practice. The thought of a client wasting their valuable time in my waiting room gets under my skin. Traffic? This is a PROBLEM!

As I sat and griped and moaned to myself, my mind slowly went back to a moment at a conference a few days prior. The speaker’s exact words that struck through my heart like a bow and arrow were as follows:

If you have a home, have food to eat, a job, and transportation to get there, you are among the top 15% of the wealthiest people of the world!”

Wow! I couldn’t believe it. I’ve never considered myself wealthy. Blessed but not wealthy.

A few days later, I was reading a book by Jim Martin from the International Justice Mission. He was talking about modern day slavery, sex trafficking, and the horrible abuse that goes on in our world. He talked about how we see our issues as problems but “they are mostly frustrations and annoyances” when it comes right down to it. So true. Losing my cell phone? Inconvenience. Stuck in traffic? Frustration. Slavery? Now THAT’S a problem!

I’m not trying to minimize the problems that some people are struggling with. Divorce, the loss of family and friends, job loss, abuse are true problems as well. But I am talking about some of the things we consider problems that are really just annoyances, frustrations, and/or inconveniences. The barista at Starbucks messed up our order so we have a bad morning. We get a little wet from the rain so we gripe and moan about going to work a little soggy. These are NOT problems!

When I was sitting in that traffic, I realized that it wasn’t a problem but rather a frustration or annoyance. I would still have a job to go to (with forgiving clients!), lunch today, and a place to lay my tired body tonight.

I have been reminding myself of this DAILY. When I feel the stress of a “problem” I ask myself “Is this really a problem? Or am I just frustrated, annoyed, or inconvenienced”.

Try it! It will really put things into perspective for you.

Written by Natalie Chandler

Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC, LCAC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling.  We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville

19Sep 2012

Influence and the Power to Impact

In April, I attended a conference where I was blessed to hear Pam Tebow, Tim Tebow’s wonderful mother, speak. She spoke on the importance of influence and the power to impact.

She talked about how when her kids were growing up she was constantly telling them about the importance of influence and how we influence people. She talked to them about how we influence people everyday either positively or negatively and that people are watching. They are watching what we say and what we do (particularly because they were a Christian family).

She then talked about how we are each accountable for our influence we have on people. Now she is not saying that we are responsible for what people do with how we influence them. They are ultimately responsible for that. She is just saying that we all influence people all day long and we are accountable for whether that is negative or positive.

Think about it-
How do you feel when the guy at the drive up at Starbucks says “Hey, how are ya today?” vs. him just handing you your coffee without saying a word? You are influenced and probably think “What a grouch!” with the latter.

How do you react when you walk into work and no one utters a word to you vs someone saying, “Hey! Good to see ya today. Have a great day today!” You are influenced more positively by the person who spoke.

How do you feel when you walk in your house and your spouse doesn’t acknowledge you or even look your way? Kind of sets the tone for a negative evening doesn’t it? Influence.

It’s our choice what we do with how we are influenced by others.
But it is very important to remember that we influence others as well. Not that we are responsible but accountable to try to be more positive in what is already a pretty tough world.

Obviously Pam Tebow had no clue at the time just how influential her son would actually be one day. In the same way, none of us know exactly how our attitude can influence others. So choose to be a positive influence and have the power to impact! Your “small” influence can have a ripple effect and make things more positive all over!

Thank you so much for reading and have a wonderful day!

Written by Natalie Chandler

Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling.  We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville.

12Sep 2012

Red Light, Green Light

Ever had a green light day? You know, where every light you hit was green and you were able to breeze into work. Those are the best. I just had one on my lunch break. I ran to the bank and was thankful to have all green lights. Ahhh

Ever have a red light day? Yeah- those are the ones we remember! We hate those don’t we?!?! It seems every light is not only red but turns yellow just as you are approaching it. We had one of those recently while running late to a soccer game. Ugh! Not a good time!

It’s amazing how a red light or a green light can set our attitude for the day, speaking metaphorically of course. The little things in life can easily affect our moods. If the milk spills in the morning, generally we “cry over it” the rest of the day, unless we chose otherwise. If the kids are grumpy, yeah…it sets the tone for a bad day. Bad hair day? Yuck! Bad mood!

When you think about it, these really are little things in light of the pain people are suffering that live in our world. But we make them such big things! Big enough to affect us for an entire day of our lives.

Unless….unless we choose differently. We can choose how we are going to respond. Yes, the milk spilling was very frustrating. I’m grateful I have more to pour and that wasn’t our last cup purchased with our last dime. The kids are grumpy, yes, but I’m grateful I have kids to be grumpy. There are those who would love to wake up to a grumpy kid tomorrow.

This is one step in changing the ole attitude- seeing the positive and being grateful for what you do have.

Then the 2nd part is about moving on and not allowing it to define your day. Choosing to leave the spilled milk behind and recognizing the kids are human and have bad mornings. Choosing to go forward positive whether we get green lights or red lights.

If you get all red lights, take a deep breath and think of some things you are grateful for today (like the car you are driving and your vision to drive!) And if you get all green lights, take a deep breath, too and be grateful.

Thank you for reading. I hope you have a green light day! And if not, I hope you MAKE it a green light day in spite of the red lights!

Written by Natalie Chandler

Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling.  We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville.

15Aug 2012

Seize the Moment- The Best You Can!

Going back to school- It seems this phrase ignites different emotions for different people. For some kids it’s “bllaaahh!” and for others it’s “yaaay!”. For some parents it creates a leap of joy in the air and for others it is a reminder of how fast time is flying and slipping thru our hands.

Me? I have a big lump in my throat. I promised my 2nd grader I wouldn’t cry as he got on the bus today (as I watched him hold back a tear or two!) I saw the parents of the Kindergartners, who actually have permission to cry, hold back their tears.

So why was I, the mother of a 2nd grader, on the verge of a breakdown? I should be a pro at this by now! Then it hit me- it’s all a reminder of how quickly time is passing. I don’t know about you but I feel like I am trying to keep the sand from going down the hourglass of time! I try to put the little pieces back in one at a time, only to have 5000 drop in the meantime.

Wasn’t it just yesterday my child was……

Maybe you don’t have kids and you are amazed at how quickly time is passing in your marriage. You thought for sure at your 5th Anniversary you would be…..

Or maybe you are still single and you just can’t believe how quickly 10 years have passed since you graduated college. You knew without a doubt your career would be……

We all are amazed at how quickly time passes and even surprised at where or what we thought would be happening.

There is a point to this- it’s simple- just a little reminder. Every day, hour, minute, second is passing us by. It’s unrealistic to say, “I’m going to embrace every moment and live every day like it’s my last” (come on, we gotta work and go on with life!) But we can embrace the little things. Don’t let the small joys of life pass you by. Try not to just drudge thru the day so you wake up 10 years later, well, realizing it’s 10 years later. Don’t look up at your 18 year-old going off to college and regreting that you didn’t spend enough time with them.

Truly seize today- the best you can! Do something today to take it all in. We are blessed to have what we have and live how we live. Each of us. Take in the moment before it slips away.

Thank you for taking this moment today and reading. I hope you have a great day and seize one moment today.

Written by Natalie Chandler

Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling.  We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville