I came into work this week after 4 days of playing with my kids, taking care of our home, and not having a “routine schedule”. As I eased into my work on my ipad something just felt “off”. It didn’t take me long to realize that my glasses were dirty!! How embarrassing to admit that but it does take me awhile to notice things when I’m running around like a chicken with its head cut off in the mornings.
I quickly reached into my desk drawer and pulled out my cloth and cleaner. As I put my glasses back on I actually said out loud, “Wow! Not that’s better!” I can’t believe I was walking around (and driving) like that! Smudges, dust and dirt, make-up. Yuck!
I think we get like that sometimes. Not even noticing that our relationships have some smudges that might be making it difficult. Our friendships are being damaged by some dust and dirt that we haven’t worked on in our lives. Maybe some smears that effect how we parent our kids. They become un-noticeable to us, yet noticeable to those on the receiving end of our relationships.
This is one reason why I love what I do. People come in with the smudges, smears, dust, and dirt. I get to view their stories thru a clear lens. See, I don’t carry around their baggage all day so I get a fresh perspective. This is why I believe therapy is so important. To get a different perspective from someone who is not emotionally involved and isn’t IN your life. You come in, tell your story, and hopefully get to hear what your Therapist sees without the smudges and stuff. If you have a good Therapist who is working on their own stuff (so they don’t get your stuff and their stuff confused), you can then take what feedback they give you and wipe your lenses clean.
It’s so awesome to watch people who really work at Therapy and make true life changes.
Now another key is, that person has to WANT to change. I heard a bad but funny joke in church a few weeks ago- How many Therapists does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one but the light has to WANT to change! Ok, really bad. But I chuckled as I thought about how true that is for Therapy! You have to WANT to wipe the lenses. The Therapist can hand you the cleaner and the cloth but you have to actually clean the lens.
So that’s my plug for Therapy. I try not to do that too often- I don’t want my blog to be a lecture about coming to Therapy. But sometimes I see an analogy and can’t let it go!
Thank you for reading this week. Hey….do you need your lens cleaned?
Written by Natalie Chandler
Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling. We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville