Monthly Archives: December 2009

You are browsing the site archives by month.
15Dec 2009

Trusting God in Difficult Times

In last week’s blog post, I mentioned a time when my family and I went thru some struggles that initiated significant growth in myself and in us as a family. I wanted to talk briefly about something I learned in my Faith during that difficult time.

I am often asked “Why is God allowing this to happen?” or “Why did God allow this to happen to me?” I am often posed the question from someone who wonders if they didn’t have enough faith. I never really understood this until I went thru something that caused me to ask this question.

To make a very long story short, 3 years ago I was 6 weeks pregnant and told by my Dr. that the heartbeat was faint but because it was so early, the baby may still be developing. He was “cautiously optimistic”. As I left the Dr.’s office, I felt so afraid and sad. My husband was surprised but seem so much more optimistic. He said we just needed to have faith and trust that everything would be fine. I immediately thought “Oh yeah! What am I thinking? God will totally take care of this. We just have to have faith.”  I really didn’t worry that much over the 2 week period because I felt God had my back on this one. You can imagine my surprise when we went in for the ultrasound and the baby had not made it. I was so sad and couldn’t figure out WHY! Why had God let this happen? Why had he not stopped it or made the baby stronger? WHY??

I had some difficult conversations with God during that time. He also sent some amazing people, books, passages, and God  winks that helped me, in my mind, understand.

See, just because we believe in God, we still live in a broken world where we are not immune to difficult things that happen to real people. If God sheltered us from pain because we believe in Him, everyone would believe. Not because of their faith but because they would want the shelter. And that is not faith.

Why does he let some things happen and some he does shield us from? I don’t know the answer to that. But what I found is that no matter what, he NEVER gives us more than we can bare and He will faithfully carry us thru anything we face. That is what I found my trust in- He will not always give me what I want or what I think is best, but he will see me thru whatever it is I am going thru. I thank God for that promise.

Thank you for reading.

*Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling.  We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville.

08Dec 2009

Growing in difficult times

Yesterday, Teri tweeted a great tweet that reminded me of something that is so important: growing in difficult times.

Raffiiki “It’s in the past!” Simba “But it still hurts!” Raffiki “Learn from it?”

I LOVE this line from the movie The Lion King. It reminds me of how important it is to learn from our pain and from our past. Sometimes we just see pain as hurt and sorrow.  We might ask “Why is all this happening to me?” But sometimes, if we dig a little deeper, these are excellent opportunities for stretching ourselves and growing beyond what normal day to day life allows.

Exactly 3 years ago, my family and I were going thru one of the most difficult, stressful times in our lives. Over a span of 9 months we lost a baby to miscarriage, had a move into a house fall thru that left us moving 5 times (what a long story!), we lost my husband’s mother to cancer, and those were just the major events. It seemed little things just kept happening to us, too. It was such a struggle. However, I remember telling my husband that despite all this pain, I had never felt myself grow so significantly in my life. It brought so many things into perspective for me.

I learned that a house didn’t matter, it was my family that  mattered. I could literally live in a box and be ok if I had them. (I didn’t say I would enjoy it but I would live!) You’re never the same after losing a parent: cherish them when they are here. The main thing I learned is just because you trust in God, you may not always get what you think is best for you and what you want. But He will carry you thru it no matter what.

It’s amazing- 3 years later- I am growing all the time but I still don’t believe I have grown as much since then as I did in that 9 months total. Thank God for pain. It really does initiate growth- if we choose to see the opportunity.

I plan to blog in the future on trusting God even when it’s not what we want and creating meaning from pain. Check back in a few days. Thanks for reading.

*Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling.  We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville.