Monthly Archives: January 2012

You are browsing the site archives by month.
25Jan 2012

HALT

Have you ever heard the acronym HALT? It is a great tool to use when you are struggling and aren’t sure where it’s coming from. It could be as simple as just feeling “off” for a day or two. Or it could be an evening where you just feel like crying and you don’t know why. Basically, with HALT, you ask yourself the following questions:

Am I…
Hungry?
Angry?
Lonely?
Tired?

Hungry
We all know when we get too hungry we can get cranky and easily upset. This actually is a biological response. Usually our blood sugar is getting low and this causes us to not feel well, have poor concentration, and sometimes impatience.

Angry
When we are angry about something or with someone we can feel easily irritated or irritable. Many times we may be angry and don’t even realize it. It could be something that happened a week ago that we are still holding onto. So it’s important when nothing is specifically wrong, but we are feeling bad, to ask ourselves if we are angry about something.

Lonely
We were all created for relationship and if we isolate ourselves this can lead to depression. It’s important to try to schedule some things with people we enjoy to be with. If we don’t, many times we can feel down or blue and again, not know why. So check in to see if you are isolating yourself.

Tired
How many of us can see our motivation levels go down, our tolerance for any type of pain or inconvenience go up, and our moods slide when we are tired? Sleep is so important to keep your mood elevated. Sometimes, if we haven’t been getting enough rest, a good nap can elevate our moods and lift our spirits. A sudden burst of energy can come from even a 15 minute nap. Don’t underestimate the power of sleep. It is a natural way to restore our bodies.

This seems so simple- it is!! If you are ever down and not sure why, this is a great tool to use. However, if you can’t seem to get thru it and your Depression seems severe, it is important to seek help. Obviously, at times, there can be more going on than just being hungry, angry, lonely, or tired.

Thank you for reading. I hope this tool will be a great one to pull out of your mental health tool box in the future. Have a great week!

Written by Natalie Chandler

Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling.  We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville

18Jan 2012

Do You Need Your Lens Cleaned?

I came into work this week after 4 days of playing with my kids, taking care of our home, and not having a “routine schedule”. As I eased into my work on my ipad something just felt “off”. It didn’t take me long to realize that my glasses were dirty!! How embarrassing to admit that but it does take me awhile to notice things when I’m running around like a chicken with its head cut off in the mornings.

I quickly reached into my desk drawer and pulled out my cloth and cleaner. As I put my glasses back on I actually said out loud, “Wow! Not that’s better!” I can’t believe I was walking around (and driving) like that! Smudges, dust and dirt, make-up. Yuck!

I think we get like that sometimes. Not even noticing that our relationships have some smudges that might be making it difficult. Our friendships are being damaged by some dust and dirt that we haven’t worked on in our lives. Maybe some smears that effect how we parent our kids. They become un-noticeable to us, yet noticeable to those on the receiving end of our relationships.

This is one reason why I love what I do. People come in with the smudges, smears, dust, and dirt. I get to view their stories thru a clear lens. See, I don’t carry around their baggage all day so I get a fresh perspective. This is why I believe therapy is so important. To get a different perspective from someone who is not emotionally involved and isn’t IN your life. You come in, tell your story, and hopefully get to hear what your Therapist sees without the smudges and stuff. If you have a good Therapist who is working on their own stuff (so they don’t get your stuff and their stuff confused), you can then take what feedback they give you and wipe your lenses clean.

It’s so awesome to watch people who really work at Therapy and make true life changes.

Now another key is, that person has to WANT to change. I heard a bad but funny joke in church a few weeks ago- How many Therapists does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one but the light has to WANT to change! Ok, really bad. But I chuckled as I thought about how true that is for Therapy! You have to WANT to wipe the lenses. The Therapist can hand you the cleaner and the cloth but you have to actually clean the lens.

So that’s my plug for Therapy. I try not to do that too often- I don’t want my blog to be a lecture about coming to Therapy. But sometimes I see an analogy and can’t let it go! :)

Thank you for reading this week. Hey….do you need your lens cleaned?

Written by Natalie Chandler

Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling.  We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville

11Jan 2012

Your Life as a Reality Show!

I’m amazed at how hooked we can get on being voyeurs into people’s lives! The popularity of watching reality shows about rich people, drugged up former rock stars, and people singing for a million dollar contract has replaced the once popular sit-coms we all enjoyed. I admit, I love peeking into the lives of the American Idol contestants and finding out what they are really like!

We often joke around here and about how our lives outside of session could be a reality show. We all really enjoy working together. We like to laugh together (often AT each other) and playing jokes on each other. When you think about it, our careers are pretty intense, listening to challenges all day long. So we need somewhere to let go and laugh. This is the place! And we actually think people would enjoy watching it! (Or maybe we would only enjoy it!)

This got me thinking about what if our lives were a reality show? Would we be embarrassed of our lives people don’t see? Now I don’t mean the day-to-day things we wouldn’t want people to see. Yes, we all go to the bathroom, make occasional noises we don’t want others to hear, and laugh at things we probably shouldn’t. But I mean how we LIVE.

Would you want your co-workers knowing that you go home and scream at your kids at night? Or that you go home and eat a bag of chips, washing it down with a box of Twinkies. Or would you want people at your church or parish knowing you view porn when your family goes to sleep or that you’ve gambled your retirement away? Those are the kinds of things I am talking about.

Now none of us would truly want to be followed around 24/7 with a camera. But in general, do you live your life the way you portray it? Or do you have double (even triple) lives?

It’s important to think about WHO we want to be and live that out in every area of our lives. I think that’s part of the problem. So many people aren’t sure who they are so they go thru life trying to figure that out by filling voids, trying things secretly to fill the void, and all the while feeling empty and still not knowing who they are.

If you feel this way, I encourage you to call us. Therapy is a safe, non-judgmental place where you can let someone see the reality show of your life without judgement or being afraid that you are hurting them. They can help you sort thru it, find the voids, and work on who you REALLY want to be.

So what’s your reality show??

Written by Natalie Chandler

Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling.  We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville

04Jan 2012

Dreams and Longings

Over the Holidays I started reading a wonderful book called, “Fresh Brewed Life” by Nicole Johnson. This is a wonderful book about how to bring freshness to your hum drum, day in-day out life. I am only up to chapter 4 and have already learned so much. I’ve been inspired in new ways with my journaling and being more honest with myself and frankly, God.

Last night I was reading about the difference between dreams and longings. I just HAD to share it with you, as you might not have time (or a desire) to read the book.

She was stating how a dream is something we really want and can actually have. A longing is something we will never have. For example, someone may dream to get married one day. They may long to have that man understand them, complete them, and meet all their needs. See the difference? One is something that could happen (a dream). The other is something that is impossible (a longing)- impossible because no one can “complete” us or meet all our needs.

Then she talks about the importance of knowing the difference so we are not constantly seeking something that will never be. Once we realize it’s a longing and something we cannot have, we must grieve it. Oh yes, the lovely grief I so readily talk about. Not fun- not pretty- but necessary.

In realizing this, it was amazing to me how many “longings” I have that I need to let go. I am someone who doesn’t give up very easily. It goes in my favor much of the time. But oftentimes can make me stubborn and unwilling to let go of things that I clearly need to let go. I was able to see thru the journaling the things I need to quit longing for and to let them go. And yes, grieve.

So I challenge you to do the same. Write down your dreams. Then look at what might be a longing. Decipher between them. Those that are dreams- go for it! Longings- start to let go!

Thank you so much for reading. And thank you, Nicole Johnson, for being so inspiring in your wonderful book, “The Fresh Brewed Life”. You are giving me fresh things to think about!

Written by Natalie Chandler

Natalie Chandler, MA, LMHC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Natalie enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, and couples counseling.  We also specialize in family counseling, child, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Westfield, and Zionsville