As a marriage therapist, losing a couple to divorce is like a Dr. who has helped a patient thru a long term illness and then loses them to the illness. It is so sad. You want to keep telling them to fight harder and longer, yet you understand how hard they have already fought and understand the fatigue. It is just sad and difficult.
Always ask yourself when you are planning to leave:
Can I look myself in the mirror and say that I turned every possible stone?
If divorce was not an option and I HAD to stay in this marriage, what would I do to make it better?
Whatever you do, don’t give up before seeing a professional, QUALIFIED therapist. You never know what you might learn and find out about yourself and your relationship.
That is a good way to look at it, as if in hindsight several years later. “Five years from now, will I be able to look at myself in the mirror and know that I tried everything I possibly could do to save it?” It helps to look at it from a perspective of a different time, when the hurting will not be so intense. Thanks for the insight.