Comparing can be a slippery slope ending in dissatisfaction, discontentment, and depression. So why do we do it so often? What do you gain by comparing yourself?
If only I was like him…If only we had a bigger house like the one down the street…If only my kids acted better like hers…If only my marriage was like theirs…If only we had endless money…If only _____, THEN I would enjoy my life, feel loved, be satisfied, be happy and secure.
Sounds like people who think this way have their happiness controlled by too many “if only’s”.
Focusing on the “if only” keeps you from focusing on what you DO have in your life. Stop worrying about all the things others are doing and start focusing on what you are doing. Life is happening all around you. There are so many things you have that are blessings. Don’t ignore them and devalue them by getting lost in comparisons. Reality is that everyone has issues even if they “have it all”. Contentment starts from the inside and by valuing life for what is it- not for what it could be.
Don’t be paralyzed by “if only’s”. It is time for you to get out there and live your life. Reclaim it instead of giving it away to the “if only’s”. Look around and see ALL that YOUR life has to offer!
Written by Teri Claassen MSW, LCSW, LCAC
Teri Claassen MSW, LCSW, LCAC is a licensed therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group. Teri enjoys doing marriage counseling, individual counseling, couples and relationship counseling. Teri also does family counseling, child counseling, and adolescent counseling. Imagine Hope serves the Indianapolis area, including the surrounding areas of Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Zionsville, and Westfield.